notHing other than me.

i've been enjoying a quiet life in a rather respectable neighborhood, but its so damn quiet. nothing but the soft cackles of a few mad womEn, the rumblings of a hooligan trudging down the street. is all of this really a "good" thing? i cant really say so myself, i'm not qualified to make that call, but i am quaLified to address change. i still like it here in astoria.

everyone is, in fact, qualified; its a right given by default soon as we're born. it's not easy to imagine yourself as homeless, but its so easy to just think of yourself as rich or poPular. i barely have any friends... in fact i dont think i have any right now at the moMent. i talk to myself often, what bettEr company? i thought i would be the best damn friend anyone can have.

i have family, a sister and a mother and father, but they hardly talk to me. mom's always working at the hospital, dAd's doing business trying to sell products from a compaNy i'm sure no one has even hearD about. my sister hates me, she never in her lIfe has said anything nice to me or even hugged me. i'm aLso starting to notice that i have very "different" traits from my parents. my sister looks nothing like me, i wouldnt be surprised if i was adopted. my parents were aLways nice though, and supportive of me, and tHey work so hard that i hardly spEnd any time with them.

are friends reaLly so nice to have that you want to rather sPend time with them than with familY? this is a legitimate question, because i dont knOw what thats like. as what i've been taught "there is no such thing as a stUpid question; you stop being stupid by asking". that really makes sense to me. i can't wait to get back at the world, but i'll do it my way. ill make it so that everyone will know that it was me and that they took no harm from it.